Instructor Orientation

Last night was Instructor Orientation. It was the night where we received a copy of the Master Plan (the nights that we're teaching), and also to learn the Rules of Engagement.

Aside from being there to teach most of the hands-on practical days, I was disappointed to find out I was only teaching two lectures. Salvage and Overhaul and Ropes and Knots. Ugh. I'm hoping it's a testimony to my great motivational, inspirational and awe inspiring teaching skills that I received two of the three dullest lectures (the third being Wildland Fire), but really I think it's cause I'm the low man on the totem pole and shit flows downwards.

I was also surprised to learn that we are being a kinder, gentler Fire Service. Apparently it is much harder to remove the chaff from the wheat now - much more paperwork and documentation is required to beg the County Administration for permission to remove students before they go out into the real world and kill someone (and that person is unfortunately unlikely to be themselves). We had some issues in the last class with a couple of people who demonstrated the validity of the [My State] Department of Fire Programs Firefighter 1 testing. Basically we learned that if you have a pulse, you can pass. Cerebral functions are apparently entirely optional.

Traditionally, one of the more effective ways of removing the unwashed from the program is the Consumption Test. This is where we have the students carry a weighted highrise pack (45lbs or so) up and down stairs 2x, drag a tractor tire that has been weighted with sandbags (170lbs-ish) the length of the Pad (the training ground) 2x, simulate pulling ceiling with a weights pikepole on a weighted and springloaded ceiling prob 40x, chop with an axe 40x, climb 3 flights of stairs and pull a 50' coil of 1.75inch hose hand over hand up and over the railing and back down again 2x and finally raise a permanently mounted 36' truss beam extension ladder on their own. All while in full turnout gear and on air.

However, this time, we're doing less than 1/2 of that. Looks like the Whiny Bitch Movement is infiltrating my hallowed Fire Service.

One of the larger, more senior and self inflated instructors (one of the Holy Triumvirate) also went on a tirade (as usual) regarding the absence of some of the Instructor Force and how they are Not Committed and Letting the Students Down by not being here so we could remove some of the inconsistencies in the program. This was most ironic as he is one of the larger contributors to the inconsistencies in information that our students face.

It was pointed out to him that the missing instructors where currently teaching the EMS First Responder class. Happily, as another tirade began to wash over us, [Ned] came and saved me by dragging me (kicking and screaming for joy!) to assist with the aforementioned class.

Ned rules.